The past few days have been a whirlwind of emotion. It all started with an email. I sent an email to a girl who was overtly announcing her pregnancy. At first glance it may seem that I was out of line, but just like any story there is a backround story. The girl has been inconsiderate, rude and self centered since the beginning of our meeting almost two years ago. She is someone who puts herself first before her husband and even her children. I kept my mouth closed when she referenced her daughters as "bitches", they are 2 yrs old and 7 months, I gave my opinion nicely when she told that she lied to the tanning salon so that she could continue to tan while pregnant, i was compassionate when she admitted to having an eating disorder, i kept my mouth shut when she went crazy on another mother for giving her daughter the same middle name as her own daughters first name. I avoided her posts and swept our differences aside for the harmony of our group. But once one of my friends lost her son and once the tacky and overtness of this girls "wonderful" pregnancy news came out I had to say something. Three days earlier she was hoping to not be pregnant. She didnt want to get fat and stretched out, she hated being pregnant, it made her "miserable", she couldnt hand 3 kids under 3 years old. Yet once the news broke she made a complete turn around and started posting like she had been trying for years.
So I sent an email asking her to "cool the posts" that it was hurtful and distasteful especially when our friend had lost her only son only two weeks ago. I didnt expect her to not be happy about her pregnancy, if she wants to disallusion herself and act happy then that is her problem but to make 7 posts regarding the news and throw out all the comments from the previous 3 days....well that is a hypocrite and an insensitive one at that. So she responded with hate, evil and condiscending tone. It wasnt "her fault that Wyatt had died" and his mother was "selfish" to not have aborted him at 20 weeks when they found out he was sick. The moment I read this I broke down. How could someone say these things about a grieving mother, how could someone even think these things? Who was she to decide if Wyatt should be born? Was she God? In fact the most heartbreaking part is that she says she is a Christian yet she promotes abortion even when it is Gods will that the child be sick? I agree that people can have a difference of opinions and that diversity makes the world interesting but there is no room in my life for evil and vindictive behavior and hurtful words.
The saddest part of this whole situation is that not all my "friends" felt this way. They didnt see the evil that she seethed into her email. The women who i trusted with my sons birth story, the women who i trusted with my marriage issues, the women that I trusted with my everyday life stories and they didnt stand behind me. Not even me, they didnt stand behind the one person who was hurt the most. Most importantly they didnt stand behind Wyatt. By them defending her, they are saying that his life was dispensable, that they are not going to stand up to someone who thinks he should never have been born at all. Only a few, a handful, had the courage to take a stand. To those I greatly appreciate. So maybe I dont know these other women at all...
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